we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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