I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
