I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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