You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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