i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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