he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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