Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
