the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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