There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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