I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize