The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
