I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
