But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
