Everything about him screamed your future.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
