You're so nebulous sometimes
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
