I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
he thought i was a dude.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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