Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
should my penis look like a turkey
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
