Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
