But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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