i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
