I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
