My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
