I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
FUCK WHALES
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
