Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
