no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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