I wish my penis had an off switch
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
