Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
