Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
