The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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