i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
