Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
