is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
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