Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
