Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize