Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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