Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
