Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
