How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
