I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
