so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
