all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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