do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
