no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
