Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Found your dick twin last night
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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