she woke up with a sticky ear
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize