Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
