Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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