We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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