A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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