Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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