"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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